Neighbors from Hell: A True Struggle

 I want to ask you a straightforward question: Have you ever had a quarrel or dispute with your neighbor?

People sometimes or most times have issues with either their tenants or landlord, which is quite common and understandable. But what if it’s a neighbor opposite your house? How would you handle a situation like that? Imagine a scenario where the house opposite yours, with some distance separating yours and the house, is involved in a fight or a misunderstanding, leading to a feud.

Some Neighbors Can Be Troublesome

 Why are some neighbors troublesome? Imagine you are staying in your property, your home, your house, and trouble comes knocking? How would you handle such? You would agree with me that some neighbors are sweet and loving, while others are sent from hell to torment and suck up the joy in the environment.

How would you handle a situation where you often greet your neighbors and exchange pleasantries anytime you see them, like that’s what you owe each other most times, all of a sudden they stop exchanging pleasantries and greeting you, and even go to the extent of telling their kids to stop greeting you?

Choosing to Be Cordial or Nice to a Troublesome Neighbor

As typical Nigerians, we understand the importance of greeting neighbors in our environment and the people we meet, respecting elders and the land’s culture, making peace with our neighbors and tenants, and minding our own business.

In the bible, Jesus said, Love your neighbor as you love yourself. You’d agree with me to some extent that, in reality, practicing  His teaching is hard, let’s be honest! How can you love a troublesome neighbor, a neighbor who is jealous of you, or one who gossips about you? How can you love such people? Ideally, won’t you just distance yourself from such?

To love a horrible neighbor can be a huge task, but it’s possible. Yes, it is! It can be done with wisdom because the bible says wisdom is profitable to direct. It’s hard to purge our minds from hate and anger toward horrible neighbors, but by loving from a distance, I believe it can be achieved. There is this saying that salutation is not love, which I strongly believe. You can choose to love regardless.

If you have a good and kind neighbor, you don’t know what God has done for you. Some neighbors can go the extra mile to start harassing you, wanting to deliberately pick a fight or quarrel with you, or loiter on your property(especially if your houses are nearby)

Personal Experience

I’ll give you a personal experience I had with some problematic neighbors. You see, I have trees and plants in front of my house, more like shades (palm trees). Most of the time, neighbors, hawkers, or passersby sit in front of my house in the shade, especially on sunny days, to relax. Anytime I see them, I greet them, and they reciprocate the greeting by appreciating me for allowing them to sit in front of my house. Though I tend to interrogate some faces I’m not comfortable with, because I’m security-conscious as well.

This happens most times, everyone is happy, not until one day, a neighbor whose house is directly opposite mine, and her kids started loitering in front of the house with a sachet of water(insert image), biscuit sachet, and nylons, etc. This particular neighbor has a provision shop (caravan) in front of her house, which is opposite mine, where they sell household items as well. Whenever I’m coming back home, my front yard is most of the time littered with dirt. Anytime I see such, I just quietly clean it up myself.

One fateful day, I was driving to my house, and as I was approaching close to my property,  I saw my neighbor’s teenage daughter, consciously throwing sachets of water(popularly known as pure water) at my front house! The moment I  got to my gate, I called her, “Lizzy, come here.” She came feeling guilty and afraid. I simply told her to pick what she threw at the front of my house, which she did. I scolded her by telling her that what she did was wrong, and she apologized. All of a sudden, her mom came out and told Lizzy to go inside the house. She didn’t even bother to ask what the issue was;na wa oo (I was surprised).

I felt angry at the mom’s approach, but I kept quiet and went inside my house. At least the young girl apologized. Since that fateful day, the neighbor stopped greeting me, but she still continued sitting in front of my house because of the palm tree shade. I tried greeting her, but she ignored me. Then I decided to keep my cool and mind the business that pays me lol. This went on for a while; it was so weird that she (the neighbor) stopped her kids from greeting me. Her lastborn, who happens to be 2 years old child, whom I love to carry and play with, and sometimes buy goodies for, the neighbor stopped me from carrying the child as well. I kept my distance and continued to be myself.

One beautiful Saturday morning, someone called me to say that he was on my street, close to my house. I opened my gate, came out, and noticed that someone had arranged lots of plastic buckets for storing foodstuffs like garri (cassava flour), beans, and flour on top of my waste bin.

Then I asked  Salami, who happens to be a gate man to the house after mine, if he was the one who did such, and he said no. It was confusing to me. I wanted to take the plastic buckets off my property. Hurriedly, the neighbor who hadn’t been talking to me for a while came out from her shop and started shouting and insulting me. I ignored her, then my visitor finally came, who happens to be a friend. He said I shouldn’t banter words with her, which I didn’t.

I was keeping my cool all this time she was being disrespectful, until she threatened my life, and she also said she would tell her oldest child, who is a boy, to deal with me. That, right there! I didn’t take it lightly because I don’t joke with threats, so my friend and I drove to the police station. Mind you, she wasn’t the only one being disrespectful; her sisters joined her to harass me because she had obviously told them lies about me.. I used to be cool with the sisters before, but all of a sudden, they joined their sister against me, which is not strange. Family supports each other, right? Lol.

When I got to the police station, I petitioned all of them. Two days later, the police came to arrest them for defaming my name and threatening my life. After the whole process with the police and the law, I can tell you that they were like cold water. They stopped harassing and encroaching on my property.  

What To Do When You Are Faced With Problematic Neighbors

The thing is, no man is an island. But it’s good when dealing with or associating with people around you, especially neighbors, you should be mindful and conscious. Greet and stay in your lane or space. Don’t be too friendly; just have a cordial relationship with them.

Neighbors can have positive or negative energy. Never allow the ones with negative energy to rub off on you. The Bible says Love your neighbor as yourself. So please love, safeguard, protect, and secure yourself first before you transcend or pass the love to your neighbor, especially the ones from hell. It’s good to love one another because God mandated us to. As much as we love people, we should also apply wisdom and set healthy boundaries. Wisdom is profitable

to direct.

Have you had any similar experience? I’d love to know.